Monday, July 14, 2008

Oh bother...

Why do Mormons have such a hard time grasping basic principles of not looking like complete psychos? Honestly. Try to tone down the crazy, brothers and sisters... at least in public.

To wit: this bit of silliness. Is that honestly worth the trouble? Who comes off looking wild-eyed snake-dancing control-freak crazy? (Hint: it isn't the guy who made the calendar.) Obviously they didn't like the image of the church being sexed up, and that's okay (although, I think that it probably had a positive effect on missionary work... just sayin'), but if you're going to carry out disciplinary procedures because of "image" reasons, you ought to make sure that you aren't jumping out of the frying pan and into the sister-wives-and-kissin'-cousins fire. Honestly, President Davie, next time do you just want to call up the Associated Press and chant "Blood Atonement, Blood Atonement, Blood Atonement," into the phone? It would save the high council the trouble, and the "I'm-out-of-my-mind" PR message would be about the same.

It's the same thing with this. Yes, let's differentiate, but let's not look like we're stomping on the little guy (albeit the little guy with about 4 or 5 extra chromosomes as a result of freaky inbreeding). I mean, they do fall under the "Mormon" umbrella, so let's find an accurate way of distinguishing nomenclature. (Oh, and can we try not to say things like "[Real Mormons w]ear regular modern clothing and have contemporary hairstyles." That just sounds a wee bit "pot and kettle": "Oh sure, we believe in a Mother Goddess and that God dwells on a planet near a star called Kolob, and, yeah, we do think that if a ghost won't shake your hand, it's probably okay to listen to him and do what he says, and I shun diet coke like it's black tar herion, but we're not weird like those polygamous people." Besides, the hooker-hump hair thing that you see all over BYU campus may be contemporary, but it's gosh-awful. Girls could we stop that? It lengthens your face to the point that every time you open your mouth, I expect to hear Mr Ed neighing. Not attractive.)

Anyhow, that's enough for now. Just take it down a few notches, folks. We sound crazy enough without any help!

3 comments:

adam said...

Well said. While I suspect there was more to it with the calendar, who knows. Either way the only result is the church now has slightly more accurate membership roles (he had been inactive for 6 years) and he's now going to sell those calendars like crazy.

I agree with the FLDS bit, in the sense that the are "Mormon" no matter what our PR tries to say. It has been amusing to me how much we try to be called Christian, then we turn around and tell the FLDS they can't be Mormon.

The Olsen's said...

I agree church dicsiplin seems a little extreme for something that was probably just in poor taste and not a "sin". Besides I had his idea almost 8 years ago, the Elder of the month Calendar and should have capitilized on that idea befoe he did!As for the FLDS, until they start tweezing their eyebrows, i don't want them to be confused with the mormons either...totally scary unibrows.

L said...

I seriously think you are my favorite blogger. I am glad you are not a crazy Mormon. Please write more posts like these. I'm gonna pass you on okay?